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h p i - THERAPIE: O E P

 

WACHKOMA


 

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You have been away and you are back now. You had a lot to do. You are quite out of energy. You had a car accident on your way here.

We were waiting for you and wondered, what made you so late. Than you called and told us, you had an accident. I knew, you were in shock.

As you came, you did not tell much. We did not ask much. You needed time for yourself. You organised our meeting so you thought you had to take up the leading position right away.

You did not want me to do anything for you. I know what it is to be in shock. I experienced it at my car accident in Den Haag. I fell how I started shivering, I was getting cold without being cold.

The cold was inside. I asked the policeman if I could sit in his car. He allowed it. The motor was running. I was happy I was sitting in this very, very safe place. A policecar is, to me, a safe place.

You came in and I saw that you needed comfort. You are like your mother and that made you say, that no, everything is OK and just let me some minutes, than I am here.

You know who I am and you accepted my offer to give you a treatment, but only because I told you you had to come with me. I did not want you to take me the pleasure of treating you.

You are someone who does not do something because he likes or needs it. You do everything for others and you try to do things that you think your physical body needs, but your connection to your physical body is so poor that you do not feel what you need.

You think about what you might need, like me. I used not to feel because I turned off my feelings. I did it as a child because the pain was too big, I did it as a therapist because I did not want to feel all the pain the patients had.

And now, I am glad I turned it on again. Yes, I feel now when your heart is hurting, I feel when you are glad but I also feel my own gladness, my own love, my own pain.

And I love it to feel. To get aware of feelings, my feelings, the feelings of others. If you call me, I am there. I am open for everyone who needs my help or who wants to share his love with me.

That makes, why I am sitting voluntary alone at my computertable and typing these short histories. Knowing, that a lot of people will be grateful that I have written them.

I need light, I need honesty, I need love. You are light, you are honesty, you are love. That is why I love you. Our first contact has been a very important moment in my life.

I was looking for a place to live. I am still, and I came in contact with you. You listened to my story and told me a bit of yours. I felt soo good after this contact. I was not aware of it, but I felt the love that had been flowing between us.

Now I know who you are and it fits. You are the love that I felt in this contact. I am glad that you let it flow to the benefit of the Whole, that is what connects us. You go your way, I mine. We will meet again, some day, some where.

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